#B•I•T•C•H – Episode 2



As she picked up her car keys, Jummy wondered what Richard must have done this time which made Zainab to want to divorce him, she knew Richard wasn’t the ideal husband for her best friend since he had that ‘play boy’ packaging, but the fact that Zainab loved him made her to keep quiet and accept Richard the way he was.

Just in her late twenties, Jummy was single – with no plans of marriage and was the exact opposite of Zainab when it comes to looks. She was dark, short, ‘yorubatic’ and fat or maybe ’round’ would be more suitable in this context. But, irrespective of her physical looks, Jummy was the nicest friend anyone would have loved to have. There was this one time when Zainab had some health issues which had to do with a faulty kidney, Jummy was ready to donate her kidney to Zainab even though the doctors had told her she wasn’t a potential match. Another notable characteristic of Jummy was her ‘I don’t give a fucck’ attitude, she was one of those few people who didn’t put other people opinion into consideration.

Even though they had a lot of differences, Jummy and Zainab, were with no doubt best of friends.

About twenty minutes later, Jummy parked her car right at the front of Zainab’s house, they both lived at Festac so there wasn’t much hassles on the way.

Before stepping out of her car, she took ten deep breaths to calm herself because she was already. Feeling quite uneasy with herself. After that, she walked to the building gate with the intent of knocking, but on getting there, she saw the door was unlocked so she simply stepped in and headed straight to Zainab’s room.
The room was unnecessarily big and spacious, the only piece of furniture in it was a bed, a chair and a dressing table which had a gigantic mirror attached to it. At one of the extreme corner of the room, Zainab sat on the floor, crying as if she expected the tears to change something in her life.

Jummy who saw this became worried and with a tone of authority, she asked;
“And what do you think you are doing?”

Zainab was startled by that question, she was familiar with the voice and she knew Jummy had said she was coming but there was no way she could have entered the house without knocking, she was surprised;
“How did you get in? I thought the door was locked?”

“After spending six years working for the CIA, you learn a lot of things” Jummy said jokingly, hoping her friend would at least smile.

Zainab got the joke and forced a smile, She didn’t mean to limit her friend but working for the CIA wasn’t even an option, her sense told her she probably left the door opened.

Jummy who was waiting for a response figured she wasn’t going to get any, so she walked to corner where Zainab was, dragging the only chair in the room with her and she placed the chair just at the front of Zainab, then she sat down and starred at Zainab in silence. Zainab looked up at her friend and had this ‘so you can’t sit on the floor with me?’ Look on her face, Jummy understood what the look on her friend face meant so she replied;
“What na? Shey na me force you to sit down for floor?”

Zainab giggled at this question, she didn’t know how Jummy did it but Jummy always had a way of making Zainab laugh.

“Enhen, let’s go straight to the issue at hand. You said something when I called” Jummy said.

“Yes, I did” Zainab replied coldly.

“I think my ears weren’t hearing properly, can you repeat it?”

Zainab chuckled and repeated herself;
“I said I’m divorcing Richard”

“Wow! Do you know how long I’ve been waiting for you to say that?”

Zainab was shocked by such response, she had known from the start that Jummy never liked Richard but she didn’t really expect such response, she jokingly pinched Jummy on the leg and asked;

“How can you say such a thing? I was hoping you would talk some sense into my head?”

“Some sense? That’s what am doing at the moment na, Richard is a cheating son of a bitch. He thinks because he now earns a six figure wage on each movie he produces that he can treat you any how, he seems to forget that the only reason he is famous is because of you helped him out”

Zainab didn’t know what exactly to reply to Jummy, every single word Jummy said was true. Richard was truly a ‘nobody’ when he first met Zainab but after she somehow fell for him, she used her connections as a popular TV personality to push Richard career and ironically, he now earns more than Zainab.

Jummy saw that Zainab was lost in her thoughts and decided to put more kerosene to fire before Zainab changed her mind;
“When was the last time he told you he loved you? When was the last time you both went out on a date together? Can’t you see that the only reason you guys are still together is because Richard is a coward and can’t divorce you himself.” Jummy paused to see if Zainab was even listening to her, and the look on Zainab face replied in the affirmative so she continued; “let me ask you a question, have you told him you want a divorce?”

“Ye.. Yes” Zainab replied as she had already started crying round two.

“And has he called you to beg or apologize since then?”


“Hmmm, is that the kind of man you want to spend the rest of you life with? I know a lawyer who specializes in cases like this and if you give me the go ahead, the divorce papers would be ready before 12pm tomorrow, the ball is in you court now” Jummy concluded.

Zainab was stuck between cross roads, she still had some feelings for Richard, no mater how much he broke her heart, the broken pieces still loved the guy, but she wasn’t ready to spend the rest of her life with someone who don’t feel the same way about her, she took a deep breath and without even looking at Jummy she murmured something like;
“Make the call now…”


The time was about 11:50am in the morning when Richard finally woke up with a banging headache, he struggled to sit back on the chair as soon as he sat, he picked up the hotel intercom and pressed the number “2”, a lady voice responded almost immediately;
“Hello, this is the customer services. How can I help you?”

“I need some aspirins immediately” he replied with an authoritative tone and waited for a response.

Truth be told, that was a very awkward request, the “Wheat baker” hotel was known for its world class customer services but delivering aspirins to their customers room wasn’t part of their services. The lady was about to rain curses on the person over the intercom for thinking he can just request for anything because he is in the hotel, but on a second thought, she decided to check who was calling first, so she checked the room number that the call was linked to and checked the name of the occupant, it read “Mr Richard Anderson”, she was shocked.

“Sorry for the delay, your aspirin would be delivered to you in short notice, do you have a preferred brand?”

“No, you ask too much questions! Just get me some aspirins!” Richard replied literally screaming and hung up.

There is this saying that ‘money makes the world go round’, and Richard had more than enough money to spin the world in whatever direction he liked.

While he waited for the aspirins to come, he brought out his laptop from his suitcase and booted it, he confirmed if the wi-fi of the hotel was active before going on to launch his browser, without a second thought he logged on to https://sochistar.wordpress.com/ to read his daily dosage of online stories, also hoping there would be a new episode of ‘Relationship Talks’ and maybe ‘Music Reviews’ so he could laugh at how Chistar yarbs all those wack songs, he was one of those people who just couldn’t get enough of that Chistar guy and his creative mind. After reading the posts he had missed he thought it wise to check other blogs for latest news, he hated the fact that Chistar didn’t post news on his blog and he had sent him several mails but that annoying Chistar dude kept on replying ‘I’ll set up a seven man committee to work on it’ as if he was GEJ.

Anyway, so he logged on to another popular blog to get the news. He got the shocker of his life! the headline made him suddenly grow white in shock. Boldly written at the top of the screen, just below the blog logo was;


Two things surprised him the most. Attached to the post was a video which showed Zainab slapping a lady who sat on the same table with Richard, the video didn’t show the part where Zainab said she would send the divorce papers but the video showed Zainab saying only “its over between us”.

Richard couldn’t believe his eyes, he knew Zainab had threatened to divorce him but he assumed it was an empty threat and had already made a mental note to take some flowers with him to the house later on in the evening and beg for Zainab’s forgiveness. But all this useless blogger had magically twisted the whole story. He was still lost in his thoughts when a knock on his door snapped him back to reality. He assumed it was the hotel services who wanted to deliver his aspirin so he sprung out of the chair and headed to the door.

Standing at the door was a man in this late forties, he looked odd in all possible ways, with his orange suit, he wore a pink glasses and he had a really full hair which he had dyed brown, as a matter of fact, calling him “Odd” would be an understatement.


“What took you guys so long?” He asked the person standing at the door. “Where are the dru…” Richard was about to add when the person cut in;

“Oh!, you were already expecting me? Good to know, that makes my job a lot easier. Here are the papers” he handed a file to Richard who was wondering why a clown was giving him a file.

As he took the file, he saw it at first but didn’t want to believe it, so he rubbed his eyes with the back of his hands and saw it once again, boldly written at the top of the file was;

The man noticed Richard’s change of facial and he grinned, he then added;

“You just got served”

Richard nearly passed out.


ff @OfficialChistar


3 thoughts on “#B•I•T•C•H – Episode 2

  1. clemzy

    welldone bruv¡ the story is beqinninq to qather shape| by the way, you`re qoinq places o, you now have an official twitter handle, my advice is for you to work more on your bloq| i remember when it all started, who says ASUU strike is not a blessinq.

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