#B•I•T•C•H: Richard gets shocked. – Episode 3

Sorry for today late update guys, had a busy sunday, anyway here is the EPISODE 3, trust me! You won’t expect what hit you. Enjoy.



Many social scientists all over the world have stated and proven that distance makes the heart grow fonder but if Zainab was used as a case study, that theory wouldn’t have been correct.
Its been over three days since Jummy made the call to her lawyer who in turn delivered the divorce papers to Richard but she hadn’t gotten any response from Richard, and this only made Zainab hate Richard the more, she had almost cried out all the tears in her tears gland but after waking up that morning, she didn’t feel the urge to cry anymore, after all, it wasn’t worth it, or so she thought.

As she paced round the house deep in thoughts, she finally paused at the front of the thirty two inches plasma LCD TV set which hung on the wall and thought out loud;
“So that FOOL doesn’t even want to attempt to settle this shey?” She thought, emphasizing on the “fool”, “He thinks I’ll be the one to beg him or what? In fact its over between us, and the funny thing is I was willing to take him back if he had come earlier to beg oh…” She added and then quickly walked to her room as if she was being chased or something like that.

She checked if her credit card was in her hand bag before lifting it on to her shoulder, and on her way out of the house, she picked up the car keys that were on the dining table and “out” she went.

Thirty minutes later, Zainab parked her Honda Accord in the parking lot of “Spot One”. Spot One wasn’t as famous as other relaxation/ good time places in Festac, but if you had money to spend and you wanted to buy the best relaxation money could afford, then it is the place you need to be.

The way she walked into the building and navigated to a seat close to the swimming pool with much confidence only showed that Zainab had been there before and was probably a regular, as she sat, a waiter came to her table almost immediately and asked for her order, Zainab was in the mood to let go of all the troubles in her life so she simply replied;
“Get me anything that would make me forget my way home”

The waiter smiled at this funny request and replied;
“Give me a minute, I know what you need”

While she waited, she picked up her phone and dialed a number;
“Hello” she said.

“Ah! Bestie of life! Ki lo shele na? (what’s happening?)” the recipient replied.

“Wait oh, Jumoke! why are you so razz? can’t you speak plain english for once? Must you speak gibberish always?” Zainab asked knowing fully well what Jumoke response would be like.

“Eh? Ta lon soro (who is speaking?)!” Jummy replied just to confirm who she was speaking to first.

“Are you blind? Can’t you see the name of the caller on your phone screen? Or are you still using that your blind phone? I’ve told you to get yourself a new phone, haven’t I?”

“Make I no talk wetin they my mind, because if I talk am, you fit run come kill me for my house. Anyway, wetin they happen na?” Jummy replied in an attempt to change the topic.

“Err.. Where are you at the moment now?”

“I they house”

“No work today?”

“Today na democracy day na, abi them no teach you for primary school say no work on public holidays?”

Zainab was tired of speaking plain english to her friend who wasn’t even attempting to switch her pigin, so she responded;
“Okay, good. I dey spot one now, you fit come jamb me for there?”

“Ah!!! Zainab is flexing sha, e be like say money don land, owo lon soro!!!” Jummy tried to flatter Zainab, and as Zainab never let flattery to get to her, she simply replied;

“Shey you they come or not?”

“Na question be that? I don they road already na, abi you no trust me?”

Zainab just laughed and hung up.

Just like clock work, as Zainab ended the call the waiter arrived at her table approximately a minute later, he dropped a drink which was in a transparent bottle and had no label on it, he placed it on her table and before he left, he said;
“Don’t drink too much if you don’t want to have a permanent loss of memory”

Zainab smiled and replied;


Richard cleared the hotel room where he had been living in for the past one week of all his personal belonging and walked down to the reception, he dropped the room key and signed out.

“Thank you for booking and staying at the Wheatbaker hotel, hope you enjoyed your stay sir?” the silly receptionist asked, she was feeling quite uneasy with herself because of Richard’s presence, he was famous, well built, cute and rich, what else could a lady want from a guy?

Richard, who had been lost in the thought of how he would go home and face Zainab Wrath was offended by the question and needed someone or something to blame for the mishaps that were going on in his life, so he replied;
“On the contrary, my stay was horrible, you guys internet sucks! Your water is contaminated and almost gave me skin infections, you customer service is nothing to write home about, you guys should be lucky am not even suing you!”

At this point, the receptionist was regretting why she asked if he enjoyed his stay, if she had known, she should have just told him “bye bye”, she also wondered what he meant by “sue”, what crime have the hotel committed? She asked herself as Richard kept on screaming unnecessarily at her.

As soon as Richard was done lamenting and nothing else to say, he hissed and walked out of the hotel pissed at himself and everything around him.

A fellow female employee who had been hiding and observing as how Richard bombarded the receptionist with all sort of lamentations came out of her hiding and bursted out in laughter, teasing the receptionist who had already calmed down and joined the employee in laughing;
“No mind the foolish man jhur, hin they find person to vex for because hin wife don divorce am” the other employee added in between laughters.

“So how that one take concern me na? Na why hin they provoke on top my head?” The receptionist added.

“I no blame am, when hin they pursue all those small girls, hin no know abi? Na so all this men they do, them go they…”

Just then, the hotel manager walked into the building and gave them an inquiring look which asked; “do I pay you both to come and gist?”, they both got the question and went back to their work posts immediately.

TIME: 8:23PM.

“Hey, am at the front of spot one now oh, which place are you exactly?” Jummy asked Zainab over the phone.

“Am somewhere close to the swimming pool, just walk towards there, there’s no how you can miss me” Zainab replied and hung up.

Few minutes later, Jummy got to the swimming pool area and spotted Zainab at a corner from a distance, Zainab looked rather hot from her point of view, ever since she married Richard, she barely saw Zainab wearing bump shorts and spaghetti tops, but today, Zainab had purposely worn the shortest and tightest bump short she had which gracefully gripped her back side in a way that all guys she passed by as she headed to the “spot one” had to look twice at her. Jummy smiled mischievously as a naughty thought popped into her head.

“Hey girl! What’s up na?” Zainab asked as she sighted Jummy.

“Am cool oh, this one you are looking this hot today, hope you won’t go home alone tonight oh?” Jummy asked in a joking tone but she actually meant it.

“Go home alone ke? That wouldn’t be possible self” Zainab replied, what ever the waiter had served her in that transparent bottle was already kicking in.

“That’s my girl! What’s this you drinking anyway?”

“This?” Zainab asked pointing at the bottle, “I don’t know oh, but its the best drink ever and when I become the president, I’ll make sure it becomes the country number one drink” Zainab was obviously drunk and Jummy noticed but she wanted to have a good laugh so she played along.

“President of Jupiter, right?” Jummy asked mischievously.

“Yes, Jupiter and Pluto” Zainab replied, feeling really good with herself, “don’t you want to drink with me?” She added.

“Err.. No oh, I don’t want to shorten your ration, I’ll order for my own drink”… She then called for a waiter and ordered for a bottle of “Snap”.

They had barely drank and gisted for fifteen minute when a dude walked up to them at their table. He was dark, tall, well built and his outfit was simple but nice.

“Hi ladies” he had a baritone singing voice that could sweep any lady of her feet.

“Hello!” They both replied in unison.

“Is this seat taken?” He asked, referring to the seat beside Zainab.

Jummy saw this as an opportunity to make sure her friend doesn’t leave the place alone so she replied;
“Taken? Not it isn’t oh, sit please”.

“Oh, thanks. Am Clement by the way” he replied and stretched his hand to shake Jummy and then he took Zainab’s hand and kissed the back of it romantically. Even in her drunk state, Zainab was impressed. Funny how a simple romantic gesture can open many doors.

“Am Jumoke and my friend’s name is Zainab” Jummy replied, even though she wasn’t asked.

“Two nice names for to beautiful ladies” he replied and both ladies smiled.

A short silence followed suite and Jummy figured maybe it was due to her presence so she decided to take her leave;
“Errr.. I need to be on my way now, I’ve got somewhere I need to be before mid night” she lied.

“Midnight ke? Are you now a witch?” Zainab asked, one can’t tell if she was joking or serious.

“Bye. Take good care of my friend for me oh” Jummy simply replied and walked out of the place.

As soon as she got out, she brought out her phone and sent a ping to Zainab;
“Better don’t screw this up, you’ll give me full gist tomorrow morning. Adios mammi.”

“Trust me na, I’ve got it all covered” Zainab replied and added wink smiley.

How Clement did it is quite surprising but all that is important is that he and Zainab were in his car about thirty minutes later, heading to Zainab’s house.


As he headed home, Richard stopped by a flower shop, he knew Zainab loved flowers, daffodils in particular, he didn’t know why she loved them but didn’t care as long as they made her happy.

So he bought a bouquet of daffodil flowers and head straight home in high anticipation, hoping she would forgive him.

As he got closer to the house, he intentionally parked outside so as to surprise Zainab, he sneaked into the house smiling with the thoughts of how Zainab would be so glad to see him, he searched the sitting room for her but she wasn’t there, he walked to the kitchen and she wasn’t there too, so he knew she would definitely be in the bed room.

As he walked closer to the room, he started hearing funny noise but just assumed he was hearing double, as he got to the room, he did the sign of the cross and said a silent prayer hoping she would take him back.

He held the door handle and twisted it, the door swung open and he saw it, Zainab was bent on her kneels with her hands on the floor, at her back was a man pumping in and out of her, sweating a little too much.

“Zainab!” He called out her name.


ff @OfficialChistar


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